May 24th draft

I’M HERE TO KILL YOU

Mouse: I’m here to kill you.

Cat: You? A tiny gray mouse? This may be worth delaying my morning nap. Please, tell me more about these deliciously murderous plans of yours.

Mouse: I’m not here to walk you through my motivations line by line. That would take all day. I’m just here to kill you. Unfortunately, my initial plan to stealthily put this giant bell around your neck while you slept obviously failed… so as an honest mouse I feel like it’s best to come clean and accept my fate.

Cat: Ah, a common misconception about cats. Just because our eyes are closed twenty hours a day doesn’t mean we’re asleep all that time. Most of the time we’re meditating. We have extremely rich internal lives that most don’t ever inquire about.

Mouse: Oh god. Does meditation help you work off your guilt for murdering countless lives and otherwise destroying communities for generations?

Cat: What do you mean?

Mouse: …

Cat: Oh! You mean…

Mouse: …

Cat: Ah. You’re right! It’s true that I have eaten of mice. I am a cat, after all. It’s part of my job.

Mouse: You don’t have anything else to say for yourself other than “I am a cat, therefore I am a murderer and a devil”?

Cat: Oh this makes perfect sense now! You’re here to kill me as punishment, or even revenge, for what you feel are senseless acts of violence against your loved ones and community.

Mouse: Obviously.

Cat: Let me try this on. I do want to know if I can find a way to wear your utter conviction of a death sentence for myself. I want to feel into this perspective and see if I can reach the same conclusions as you for the same reasons. I am a mouse. I am a mouse. I am hateful of cats. I am afraid.

Mouse: Are you mocking me?

Cat: Not at all! But of course I can see why it could appear that way to those who are unfamiliar with this technique. But, oh, look! I can feel it. I can swim in the hate. The panic. The moral righteousness! And it’s a quick hop from there to wanting to see me dead. I want to see me dead! It’s like drowning in a lake of fire!

Mouse: Um. Okay. So you see my point?

Cat: Of course I do! It’s a pain that echoes through the ages, wallowing in indescribable pain, a staring in the face of futility, evolutionary injustice of the highest order. So many lives lost, so little acknowledgement from the antagonists, much less accountability. I feel abandoned. I feel a deep cold burn in my soul’s heart. An abyss. I feel a numbness radiating from the center of my soul. Nothing matters anymore.

Mouse: This is honestly going better than I had hoped.

Cat: I’m tired. I’m so tired. Driftless in a sea of nothingness. I would console you but I have nothing to console with. The only pinhole of light in this dark tunnel is so far above.

Mouse: Is it death? Release from this cycle of violence that you have been woven into, and in fact have perhaps unknowingly, until this second, created?

Cat: I do see that light. It’s right here, within my grasp. Why do I not pull it? Ah, wait, the light is dancing around death, but isn’t quite one with it.

Mouse: Death is the answer, the only answer. If you have any last words, please speak them now as I place this bell around your neck.

Cat: I accept the bell. Thank you.

Mouse: Thank you for accepting responsibility. It’s an honor to witness your moment of reckoning.

Cat: I accept the bell. But wait. Instead of last words, can I ask you a question?

Previous draft from April 15th, 2020

WHAT HAPPENED TO THE YELLOW MOUSE

Mouse: I was sent to kill you.

Cat: Ooh, do tell me more.

M: Aren’t you going to try to stop me?

C: Maybe. But first I need to know your reasons. Perhaps you can convince me that I should kill myself. I like to think of myself as open to opposing viewpoints.

M: It’s nothing too surprising to you, I’m sure. Revenge, justice, etc. You ate some of the most beloved members of our community, after all.

C: That is a true fact.

M: So you don’t have anything else to say about that?

C: I don’t want to interrupt, in case you have other items you want to bring up.

M: Isn’t that enough?

C: Enough for what?

M: For justifying your death of course.

C: Oh! I’m not sure! But I see how you have connected the dots of this case now.

M: And are you now prepared to die?

C: Gosh. I will have to think on that. How much time do I have?

M: How much time do you need?

C: It’s such a beautiful day.

M: A good day to die.

C: Indeed. But it’s just getting started. I would be sad to not be able to see how it ends. May I ask you a question?

M: Sure. It can be your final words.

C: Now I feel some pressure to ask a good one. Okay. Here goes. What did you have for breakfast today, Ms…

M: People call me Yellow.

C: Ms Yellow. Did you have a nice breakfast? Can you describe it to me? The Cat, like most who had ever had a conversation of any sort with a Mouse, knew that they loved to describe their meals in great detail.

M: Thank you for asking! I woke up very early, being on this quest and all, and didn’t eat until I had put some distance behind me on the road. But about an hour ago, as the sun was rising over the hills, I had a nice juicy berry that I found on the ground, you can probably still see the juice on the palms of my hands. I made quite a mess of it, but there’s nothing more exquisite than a ripe berry to tide you over on a final journey.

C: So you don’t have anything else to say about that?

M: I can definitely go into much more detail if you like. It tasted like a communion with the sunrise. As it unfolded it’s multifaceted layers of flavor–

C: And are you now prepared to die?

M: What? You mean for challenging you? You who are clearly much more overpowered than I. With much sharper teeth and much more deadly claws.

C: For eating the berry. The berry is to you as you are to me. Your communion with the sunrise flavors my communion with the noon day sun.

M: I see now. There is hope within this futile existence after all.

C: There really is, isn’t there?

M: Are you going to eat me now?

C: On the contrary. I’m now ready to die.

The Cat and Mouse sat on the cement sidewalk that stretched out in both directions farther than either had ever ventured, and for a moment they both noticed they were enjoying the sun’s heat radiating upwards from the ground.